Life Outside The Comfort Zone

I have noticed that I am my happiest self when I am not stuck in routines, so usually after I have just made some (big) change in my life: moving to a new place (or a new country), trying out new activities, discovering new places on hikes, finding new (and more sustainable) ways to do things, working on the fields and planting onions or small plants (which I have been doing quite a bit lately), foraging and learning about plants, creating new recipes, and so on. Anything that breaks my usual routines and enriches my life in a new way makes me a happier person.

Why is that?

I think it is because it helps me stay present. This is also why the nomadic life appeals to me so much and why I regularly like to change surroundings and try out new things. It brings me into a state of mind where everything seems new; a place of learning without limitations. I love living life from that place.

'Comfort zone' is a slightly misleading term though, because it implies that going outside the comfort zone is somehow uncomfortable. Yet this has not been my experience. Perhaps sometimes initially, but most often it has only been very rewarding. Staying stuck in your "comfort zone" on the other hand, is mostly very uncomfortable (even though you may not realize it until you get out of it), because you are going against your nature. Your nature is to flow with life; to change and evolve. The mind wants to grow and expand. It doesn't like staying stuck in one place for too long. Change doesn’t have to involve big outer changes though. It can take many different forms and different people prefer different types of changes. Change can happen in the types of activities we do, our surroundings, mental states, thought processes, the skills we practice, etcetera.

And yet, most people’s lives are boring and consist of the same pattern of clustered routines day after day, and week after week. And we seem to cling to these routines like it’s our only hope for survival. Perhaps because it is the only thing left that we know…. No wonder we are such an unhappy bunch and depression is rampant.

The importance of following your own voice
At times getting outside your comfort zone can get uncomfortable, but usually this is only the case when you go for something that somehow feels unnatural to you. This could happen when we do things for the wrong reasons (more for others instead of for ourselves), for example if we let ourselves get dragged into things that we don’t really want to do by well-meaning friends or relatives.

There is a fine line between going outside your comfort zone and doing things that we are not entirely ready to do at that moment, or that are simply unnatural. Going against your nature is highly uncomfortable and has no rewards in terms of personal development other than discovering that it is probably something you never want to do again. And that could prevent you from staying in the flow of discovering new things and trying out exciting stuff. So it could even contribute to you getting stuck in a rut, or get you stuck even further. So it is important to follow your own voice at all times, even though this does not rule out that you might need a little push from others from time to time, or inspiration to know what is possible and what options are available to you (because sometimes we simply don’t realize that there is another way, or we don’t know how or where to start). But you will know when you need this input from others too. Also, no one but you knows what is within the ‘comfort zone’ to you and what is not. It consists of different things for different people (and it changes with time).

Sometimes it is hard to tell the difference between natural and unnatural ways to break routines, but there are some signs that let us know when we are about to cross that line. For example, when we consider doing something that is not in line with - or even opposed to - our values or priorities in life. Then what is the point? However, if something is in line with your values and you are not doing it - because fear or other uncomfortable emotions are holding you back (or if you are already doing something even though it is not in line with your values), then perhaps it is a good idea to test the waters a bit and break those habits.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself to help you tell the difference:
1. Is this something I want to do? Is this something I really want to experience? (You don’t need to know why; sometimes there is no why and searching for it can keep you from taking action).
2. Would I do it in a world without fear?
3. Is it something that is in line with my values and what I believe in? Is it important to me?
4. (Optional, but it may provide extra motivation) Is there something really valuable I can learn from doing this?

For me, traveling has all those qualities, which is why I enjoy it so much: it keeps me from getting too stuck in my "comfort zone" (or perhaps 'habitual zone' would be a more suitable term). It allows me to explore, expand and see the world through different perspectives. It encourages me to be creative. Also, doing things differently and challenging myself (such as the Moneyless Challenge) has helped me to practice living outside the comfort zone.

Here are some things you can do regularly to avoid getting stuck in a boring life:

1. Step out of routines
Routines are a survival mechanism for boredom. Autopilot helps us to manage when our brains are overstimulated. It is supposed to be a state used for emergencies; not as a general state of being. On top of that, living a life of routines makes us VERY tired (have you noticed that?): it drains ALL our energy, so even if we wanted to change, this makes it very difficult and becomes another obstacle on our journey for change. The risk of exhaustion (and burnout) is yet another reason why breaking up with routines (one by one) is a great idea.
Also, routines create habits. And habits can be beneficial or not.  If you have no habits or keep breaking them, then you have no bad habits either and you can decide in each moment what feels right. Habits and autopilot also stop you from asking questions. It can lead to people taking things for granted and it can rob you from awareness. For example, it can lead you to forget how uninteresting your life has become, so that you don't have to make any changes.

2. Question everything
Just like behavior becomes habitual, thought processes do also. Investigate automatic judgments. Is it really true? Do some research. Investigate the way you do things. Is it the only way, or are there other ways? Try to put some variety in the way you do things, so that you don't get stuck into rigid patterns or routines. Question your fears and other emotions. Emotions will pass. Do not let them get in the way of new experiences! Of course it is always good to be sensible, but it is never sensible to jump to conclusions (like: It’s not possible. I can’t do this. There’s no other way. It’s too difficult. It’s dangerous; and so on). Also, life as it is, is dangerous and none of us will get out alive. Don't let this stop you from living life to the fullest! Life without (ad)ventures is like champagne without bubbles.

3. Be open to new experiences
Try out new things. Seek them out. Keep an open mind, because you never know what life might bring you, and this is good news! So always be on the look-out for something good coming your way. Because there is always something good on the way (even though it doesn't always seem like it).

4. Feel the fear and do it anyway
Courage is not about the absence of fear. It is about overcoming it. Letting it be there without letting it get in your way. And after a while it will just be background noise. It won’t bother you anymore.
There is even a book with this title and apparently it is very good (so I’ve heard).

Getting outside your comfort zone (= habitually getting out of habits, habitual thinking and routines) can get you to a space outside what you know and believe. It is a space of wonder and a place of learning, with the freedom of not-knowing. It is an open space, with no place to hide.  This may sound very special, and it is, but it is also easy. It doesn’t have to involve anything spectacular.
Here are some ideas of how to get out of your comfort zone, or break your routines:

* Go hitchhiking
* Sing karaoke
* Use couchsurfing - either as a host or as a guest
* Try out busking (and donate the money to a charity of your choice or to strangers on the street)
* Give Free Hugs
* Move abroad for a while
* Travel alone
* Volunteer
* Take a dancing class
* Dumpster dive
* Climb a mountain
* Learn horse riding
* Plant something: food or trees
* Go foraging

What routines do you need to break through to be a happier person?

My Declaration of Independence

The following declaration describes my personal guiding principles for life. Some of these are not yet compatible with the realities of today's societies around the world, which can leave non-compliance with the current establishment as the only option that doesn't require sacrificing one's integrity. As long as you can explain how your disobedience serves more than just yourself and doesn't harm anyone, no one can really argue against it (even when what you are doing is technically against the law). (For some examples of purposeful non-compliance, see the bottom of this page.)

I believe that non-compliance and peaceful protest are important instruments of feedback, to let the system know where its rules and regulations are no longer serving humanity or the world, or simply have lost their purpose. Actions speak louder than words, and this is just as true in politics as in any other area of life. As more people start to live for the benefit of all (sustainability) instead of just the benefit of one/some (fear-based greed), and more people refuse to comply with unjust (or redundant) rules and systems, the easier the path will become. In this way we can co-create a completely different world together.

Therefore I hope that more people will consider living their lives strictly according to their own principles instead of the ones that were handed to them by others, to pave the way for future generations and create space for alternative ways of living and thinking. We can get back to a world where we all fulfill the task of the government together and look after each other and the earth, instead of leaving it up to a few individuals of power (who usually have very unilateral ideas about what the world needs (or rather what they need and want)).

I recommend everyone to make a declaration like this for themselves. It can serve as a great reminder of what is important to you, which can be useful when you are faced with a difficult decision or going through a rough time. Don't worry about perfection - just write a draft (as I have done here) and keep perfecting it along the way. Review and edit it often. It is an exercise in awareness of truth, questioning everything and a way to train yourself to see the many ways in which you impact the world - which also provides opportunities for you to discover more ways in which you can send out positive ripples of change. If you train yourself to be constantly aware of the impact of your actions on the environment in relation to your principles and values, you will always know what to do and never second-guess yourself again. It is therefore also a character-building exercise that boosts your confidence and instantly gives your life purpose and meaning.

The Declaration

[**N.B.: This declaration is a draft of my ideas and not an official document in any way. I may update it from time to time. For now it simply describes some of the core principles that I live by to the best of my ability, and concepts and ideas that I value. 
This article is mainly intended to challenge certain hard-wired societal notions and customs that most people seem to accept as the norm without ever questioning them. It is an invitation to engage in critical thinking and reclaim the freedom of choice in individual and societal matters**]

The following is a declaration of my freedom, independence and sovereignty.

I hereby declare that I renounce my rights and duties towards any government or institution that allows oppression, money and/or power to be the cornerstones for maintaining social order and for determining the degree of access to resources, thereby artificially creating lack/inequality and disorder. I no longer wish to be "owned" in any way by any government, organization or individual of power. I no longer wish to participate -neither directly nor indirectly- in the destruction of the environment in the name of growth and progress and the mindless obedience of the law and authority figures out of fear, lack of trust and as a way to justify certain behaviors/situations and evade personal responsibility. I set myself free so that I can claim back my natural birthrights, while also accepting the responsibilities I have as a being on earth.

***Leading principle (above all else)***

My highest priority in life is my commitment to a balanced, healthy environment on earth, serving all life on this planet. With every decision I make, I solely base my actions on what is best for the earth, which is our collective home. My only task in this is to maintain balance as best I can; creating as little disturbance as possible and leaving little to no impact on the environment through my existence. If I do cause damage in some way, I look for ways to correct this: I plant trees if one has been cut down. And I grow as much food as possible and plant seeds wherever I can, because I eat food to survive.

 "Take nothing but memories, leave nothing but footprints" ~ Chief Seattle

If any shifts in the existing balance would be required, then it is up to nature itself to initiate those (e.g. through natural disasters). Nature rules the world, not people.
In my treatment of other beings (including but not limited to humans), I am mindful that I treat them either in the same way I would like to be treated, or better. I aim to never compromise my integrity, so I let honesty be my guide (even when it hurts).

1. Healthcare and other public services
I no longer wish to hand over my freedom, independence and sovereignty in exchange for access to (for-profit) healthcare and other government-provided "services". I also release myself from all the compensatory duties (such as forced labor) that are intended to fund the existence of these 'services', yet ironically can jeopardize my health. Instead, I want to take back my own responsibility for my health. I choose to learn about natural medicine and maintain a healthy lifestyle, so that I can remain in the best possible shape. I believe that any medicine that the earth provides, unaltered and unpatented, can outperform anything made by mankind when used in the right way, without the adverse side effects of inner and outer pollution. I intend to learn much more about this in the near future and then perhaps someday I can become a resource for others who are struggling with health problems.

2. Freedom to settle
I believe that as an inhabitant of the earth I have the right to live anywhere (and travel anywhere I like) as long as I am not harming anyone, including the earth. This means my natural responsibilities are to travel mindfully (without polluting), to build only ecologically friendly structures (shelters/homes) and to use only natural energy sources. Whatever part of the earth I will choose to inhabit, I will not be using the facilities provided by any government other than the ones that are forced on me for lack of alternatives (due to ongoing destruction of natural environments), such as use of roads where no natural paths have been left, and use of tap water when all surrounding sources of water have been polluted by irresponsible human activity. But I will prefer to avoid these places as much as possible and stick to the wilderness.

3. Ownership
I give up the belief in the myth of ownership. The earth (and its resources) cannot be owned, no matter who lives where or is using what at any given time. We can only borrow things from the earth, but ownership is an illusion. There is no "mine" on this earth; so from  now on "my" and "mine" will simply mean: "that which I have borrowed temporarily". Even time is borrowed. My life does not belong to any government or individual, but neither does it belong me. It belongs to nature. This is why I feel called to live my life in service of the earth and all beings.
The earth is our collective home and shared with all species. Therefore all resources are here to be shared with the collective and cannot be dominated or claimed by anyone or anything. It is our collective responsibility to use resources in a sustainable manner. When this is not happening, or someone is trying to cause destruction - in the name of ownership or for whatever other reason, I have the right (and duty) to speak up. If I do not attempt to prevent destruction, I am silently condoning it and therefore passively participating in it. The solution lies in active support of the earth.

4. Food (and shelter)
Even though resources are shared and ownership does not exist, I do respect natural habitats and boundaries (territory), and will not override others' efforts for (personal) survival, for example by finding my own food instead of taking someone else's food supplies, growing my own food instead of taking the crops others planted and building my own home/shelter instead of trying to take over someone else's (unless it is abandoned of course).
When I am not sure whether an area of land is in use by someone or not, I try to determine whether the food was planted for that purpose or not, so that I am not simply taking advantage of someone else's hard work. After all, independence is one of my main goals. When in doubt, I ask. However, I may simply seek out food that is clearly left behind (such as potatoes that are left in the field after harvest and food in supermarket dumpsters).
When I am foraging for foods, I also harvest with respect for nature. I only take what I need, and I make sure that the plant I harvest is growing in abundance. No matter where I find food for survival -whether I am foraging in nature, finding leftovers or accepting help from others- I always contemplate ways to give back. For example, I can give back to the earth by planting new seeds or by helping existing (native and non-invasive) vegetation grow and spread.

5. Money
I do not believe in money as a leading force for decision making, as the main form of exchange or as a construct with absolute value. Instead of using money to get what I need, I choose to rely on unconditional giving and forms of direct exchange (barter). This would be a much more rewarding structure for communities also, for it builds trust and mutual care. Also, it will force selfishness out of the system naturally, as people who are selfish and do not care about others will simply be ignored as a natural consequence of their behavior and therefore they will be forced to change. Selfishness and greed, which are very much rewarded in money-based societies, will no longer have any benefits, and will even be harmful to someone's social status. Instead, sharing, helpfulness and kindness will be rewarded and encouraged. These traits will be the new adaptive qualities for 'survival', or at least for a prosperous life, in communities that are based on this principle.
In addition, as long as money and rules concerning money do exist, I will not engage in the payment of unjust fees, such as property taxes or building permits for zero-impact off-grid homes / shelters. I also don't believe in forced payments for healthcare, roads, and other shared facilities / amenities when I have no intention of using them and yet have no choice to opt-out (for example, if one is registered as living in the Netherlands, one has to have (and pay for) health care insurance). I think that providing services when they are not even asked for takes away people's natural desire to create, to serve and to develop and innovate.
I am also not worried that if we stop the flow of money, the availability of these services will come to a halt. I think there will always be people who will want to help out and who will try to improve (and maintain) the system, because it is important to them or because they genuinely believe it is necessary. When not everything is 'given', this also stimulates people's personal responsibility and gives them an opportunity to contribute. It encourages a sense of purpose and involvement, because there is a need for creation and development. People will have to take initiative for improvements if they feel that something needs to change; and they will have the freedom to do so (as long as it is not hurting other species or the planet), which creates a healthier mindset and will result in a culture with a more positive general attitude and less blaming and complaining.
If you would be worried that no one will want to become a doctor anymore in a world where there is no money to be earned, then this would also have several benefits. First of all, we would all probably look after our health better. How many people truly look after their health now (with health insurance as a back-up)? How many people eat a 100% unprocessed, mostly plant-based diet? In addition, we would naturally appreciate life more, because there is a greater awareness of death at all times. In other words, people will be much more closely connected to life and death. At the moment I feel like many people take life for granted, and even postpone living because they have lost all connection with death and thereby also with life.

6. Equality of all species
I declare myself equal with all other species. I, as a human, am not worth more -or less- than any other form of life on earth, including trees and plants. All of us have the right to be here on this earth and to thrive, and all of us have purpose. Just because I am human does not mean I can use other animals for my own benefit, but I can enter into an equal partnership with them. When I do, my friendship with them is always my main priority and their collaboration with me should be voluntary at all times. Therefore I will constantly be on the lookout for possible signs of distress or discomfort. I make an effort to understand them, learn their language and communicate with them.
The equality principle is also true for people. Again, I have as much worth as any other (human) being on the planet, and as much right to be here as everyone else. I see no need for hierarchy or power structures, and therefore will not accept them. I do not support any system that tolerates and even encourages people to cause destruction to the environment, to use up more than their fair share of resources and to rule over other people (and other life forms).

7. Freedom from society's roles
I free myself of the made-up roles and labels that society has forced on me, and of the duties that are associated with them; most notably 'employee' (including all possible job titles), 'employer', 'consumer', 'citizen' and 'owner'. I will only adhere to those responsibilities that are naturally connected with the things that I choose to do in my life, and the agreements that I voluntarily make with others (which never span too far into the future). Forced contributions, as invented by man, easily become conditional ways of giving. Unconditional giving, however, is always free and without obligation. It either happens naturally or not at all. And if someone happens to be perfectly happy living their life without ever working or contributing to a society in any way (e.g. living in a cave as a hermit) then that is perfectly okay with me, too. Life is too short to be forced to do anything, especially if it doesn't even serve the planet (which, sadly, is the case with most jobs).
However, I do believe that -in a world without (artificial) obligation or rewards- unconditional giving would come back as the new normal, because it is in our nature to give. Without incentives (or punishments), giving will naturally happen unconditionally, motivated by the internal drive to give. People will continue (and even be more likely) to help each other in the absence of rewards and punishments. Not because of some role or label that society gave them, but because that is who we are. The absence of rewards and punishments also helps to bring sincerity back, which is an aspect of unconditional giving.
Unconditional giving is perhaps even more rewarding for the giver than for the receiver, and most people are missing out on that experience most of the time due to a sense of obligation (because money is involved or because of some role or duty prescribed by society). I have personally experienced this shift towards unconditional giving as I stopped using money. Money is one of the things that can poison the mind if you believe in the value that it has been given.

8. Freedom from insurance (security is an illusion)
I am no longer participating in the madness of insurance: health insurance, insurance of "property", life insurance, etc. Life offers no security and we are all going to die sooner or later. I have made peace with death (which is a good idea, since it is the unavoidable outcome for all of us) and will accept my fate when nature decides it is my time. This does not mean I will not try to heal myself if I get sick by looking for alternative medicine, asking for advice or trying to regain my inner balance when it seems lost. But I see no need to turn to governmental health institutions that operate within the parameters of profit and therefore benefit from sickness.
Many people have lost their connection with death and fear it; they want to avoid it at all costs. This goes against all principles of life and a preoccupation with death in this way ironically prevents you from making the most of life. Alternatively, if you stop living in the future and start living now, you will no longer fear death, because there is no need to extend life when you have not postponed living. Therefore, when it is my time, I will accept it. Meanwhile, I trust that life has a plan for me.

9. No law
Because it is hard to express all these principles in a written text, I also advocate the abolition of the legal system, not in the least because I don't believe in systems that promote revenge and retribution. Instead I would prefer a global system of guidelines and principles (such as this), while encouraging people to write their own. Also, where in the law is the most important rule of all: that we should look after and protect the earth and that we should be mindful of our use of resources?
So the law does not necessarily promote justice for all. In fact, the very existence of the legal system is based on inequality, as it requires authority figures to implement and uphold the law. Also, I don't believe that the existence of laws regulates people's behavior in any way. I think people will do what they do, with or without the law. So I don't think people will get more violent without a law (or less violent with one). Although I do believe they will get less violent in the absence of money (at least once they figure out how to look after themselves). Additionally, in the absence of rules and structures that create power and hierarchy (and thus artificial inequality), I think the world could be a safer, freer and more peaceful place.
The law limits a system's flexibility and forces rules onto people who had no part in the creation and formulation of those rules. It also disrupts the flow of natural behavior, making people fearful of authority and each other. On top of that, it can strengthen a sense of victim-mindedness in cases where one person harms another, or it can be used as an excuse for destruction of the environment or other types of immoral behavior when something is considered 'legal'. Another difficulty with the law is that it does not fully support all parts of this declaration yet (nor would it be possible to translate these principles into specific and all-inclusive rules).
With a system that is based on punishment and retribution, it also further promotes inequality and it even promotes violence by role-modeling the seeking of justice through revenge. For all those reasons, the law seems to be an inadequate and counterproductive component of societies. Again, it will be necessary and beneficial to accept some risk or uncertainty (i.e. that some people may act in violent ways from time to time), because it is unavoidable and the existence of laws cannot change that either.

Short summary: Freedom from the system

With this declaration, I free myself of the following structures that were put on me by governments to keep me a prisoner of the system that I was born into:
* I am no longer property of any state nor do I wish to be registered as such.
* I no longer accept any form of inequality, limits to travel & settlement, or destructive behaviors that upset the delicate balance of our ecosystem (in the name of the law, ownership, or any other excuse).
* I no longer accept society's forced roles, such as that of consumer or laborer (except when freely chosen), which means I free myself of the obligation to "work" in the traditional sense of the word (i.e. as a slave of the state and the system)
* I will no longer trade my freedom for governmental 'services' that offer a false sense of comfort or security (and again, cause destruction).

My natural duties and responsibilities are as follows:
* I vow to do no harm to others (or the planet) and be an honest, productive and contributing inhabitant of the earth and its communities.
* I will follow my own moral compass and take full responsibility for my own contribution to a better world for all beings (not limited to humans).
* I seek out my own ways to contribute positively to others and the earth.
* I do not need anyone else to tell me what is right, because I use the capacity that I have been given to think for myself.
* With the earth and all beings as my highest priority (instead of just myself), I will protect the earth and other beings in times of need.

*********************

This is my vision and I promise myself, other beings and this beautiful earth that I will live according to this declaration as best I can.

Examples of purposeful non-compliance:

- building a zero-impact home or shelter somewhere in the barren wilderness (on public land), without disturbing the animals that may already live there, with the intention to tend the soil and improve it for plants and trees to grow there.
- not paying property taxes when you have an eco-home and don't use any city water, electricity, plumbing, telephone connections or other town facilities to do with your property.
- opting out of mandatory healthcare insurance when you are eating/living responsibly and using alternative and natural health care remedies only.
- not having a job and having no intention to find a traditional job, because you contribute in ways that benefit the earth more than would be possible with a regular job (and that is actually pretty easily achieved). Also, you do not require any government money because you have found other ways to sustain yourself.
- not sending your kid(s) to school but instead allow them to learn from and about nature and how to look after it, which is far more important (and strangely enough not part of the curriculum in most schools).
- growing your own food and harvesting natural resources in an earth-friendly manner (such as collecting rainwater) should always be legal (although some reports claim it is illegal in some places - which would qualify as a perfect opportunity for peaceful protest and purposeful non-compliance).
- planting non-invasive, native trees on public land.

The bottom-line is: If it is good for the earth and all living beings and causes no harm, then it is good for us too. And anything that is good for us, should be legal. Let's make it so.

The Hitchhiker's Guide To Atlantic Road

Is it possible to travel to Atlantic Road (about a 4-5 hour drive from Trondheim) living the moneyless lifestyle? The answer is YES! Not only that, but for me it has been the most interesting and rewarding way I have ever travelled to any destination, because it was (naturally) all about the journey; about getting there, instead of just the end result. My friend Laxmi and I only made minimal preparations and just had faith that somehow it would all work out: and it did. In just one weekend, we met people from various parts of the world, all extremely interesting people with some fascinating stories and philosophies about life. It was very inspiring to get the chance to talk with each of them and hear all about what life is like for them. It was like looking through many different windows right into people’s lives. It is amazing how much you can learn about a stranger just by sitting in the car with them for a little while.

The preparations

The first thing that we looked for was accommodation, and we found it in two different places: one in Molde (our final destination near Atlantic Road) and one near Aure, about halfway down, in case we would get stranded or if we would not be able to make it to Molde in one go. We used CouchSurfing to find two wonderful hosts and informed them that we were not sure if we were going to make it, but we would give it a go. Armed with phone numbers and addresses, I felt even more steadfast and on purpose. We had a plan.

The second preparation was that we checked HitchWiki for tips on hitchhiking in Norway. As this was our first attempt at hitchhiking ever (anywhere), we needed some advice to get started. At first glance the information about Norway (and Trondheim in particular) seemed very discouraging, because the consensus seemed to be that hitchhiking in Norway is difficult and not recommended at all. According to others who had done it before, it could be almost impossible to get rides; especially longer ones. However, some people also said it was easy. One tip was to personalize our appearance by carrying a Norwegian flag. Of course we also needed signs displaying where we intended to go. So we printed the names of our possible destinations: Trondheim, Molde and Aure. And we brought a small Norwegian flag to wave at passers-by.

The final preparation was that Laxmi arranged our first ride out of Trondheim, to Klett. This seemed to be the best place to get a ride out of Trondheim, also according to the more experienced hitchhikers on HitchWiki. The girl who drove us (Eva) had picked up many hitchhikers before, so that gave us a boost before trying out, knowing that there are people who stop to offer rides to strangers. We kept our minds open, with no expectations, and no plan B.

Our starting position - Klett (just south of Trondheim)

The journey and the inspiring people we met

At the starting point we discussed our options and what the best place would be to catch a ride. We decided that we would best split up with one person standing on the small road from the shopping center that joined the main road and the other person on the main road. The main road was a highway though and people were driving by very fast. It was also difficult for them to stop. We each held up a sign; one for Molde and one for Aure. That way we would (hopefully) increase our chances. And sure enough, after about 2 or 3 minutes a car stopped already (driving on the small road leading up to the main road). The driver said he could take us to Orkanger, which was about 20 km ahead. Not much, but definitely better than nothing. So we hopped in.

He told us that he was living alone in a cabin and he just got back from visiting his son. He was suffering from a mental disorder, which prevented him from working at this time. He seemed worried to be judged when he told us, because he added quickly that he was not dangerous. I reassured him that we were also not dangerous. He went on to say that he was very grateful to be living in Norway because he got a lot of help from the government to get his life back on track. And I guess the nourishing environment (nature, clean air, beautiful surroundings) also helps a lot when one is facing tough times.

We got dropped off in Orkanger and tried to find the right road to Aure and Molde. Since we hadn’t come that far yet, we still wanted to keep our options open and aim for both towns, so that we could see where we would end up. The previous driver had told us there was a new road to Aure, so we stood there first. But with the sign for Molde, a lot of people kept pointing us in the direction of another road. So we went back and forth a few times, not really sure where to stand. Eventually we found out that the new road to Aure was also going to Molde, but the other road also lead to Molde (so there were two options), which may have been confusing for some people. We decided to aim for the new road though. By that time, more than an hour had passed and it was already starting to get dark (it gets dark here around 4 pm at this time of year). We walked a bit further along the road to Aure so that we could weed out local traffic and we held out our sign and Norwegian flag. And then we got lucky. A car stopped with two very friendly guys, who told us they were going to Aure. That was 113 kilometers of our journey taken care of!

The driver, Kjetil, told us that his wife Kaija would perhaps be able to find us a ride to Molde via Facebook, so we exchanged details, he took a photo of us and she posted a request on Facebook whether anybody could take us back to Trondheim on Sunday. Meanwhile we had arrived at our destination 150 kilometers from home after only two rides with beneficent strangers (and one ride with a friend). 

We got picked up by our host, Adrian, who met with us at the local shopping center, and soon we arrived at his beautiful home in a tiny village (collection of farms) at the end of a road, and we got introduced to his wife Marte and their one-year-old-daughter. We got a tour of the farm and then shared food. We all contributed some dishes and ended up with a tapas-like meal. Adrian’s wife had also prepared a very tasty dessert (like apple cake). We talked a lot about farming, deserted cabins and hiking. In spring Adrian will start preparing to expand productions on the farm and we were both interested in coming back to help out when that time comes. Hopefully we can do so.

We both got our own room and after some more conversations about inspiring topics during an evening walk, with a beautiful view of the stars without the usual light pollution from the city, we had a good night’s sleep.

The next morning we got up early, because we wanted to take advantage of the daylight for our continued hitchhiking adventure. So after a full breakfast, lovingly prepared by our hosts, we took a group photo in front of the house. After that, Adrian gave us a tour of the valley and drove us back to Aure where we could try to catch our next ride. 

We were dropped off on the road to Molde and were hoping for the best. Unfortunately not many cars passed by and not many drivers seemed interested in stopping. We stayed on the side of the road for about half an hour and then we started walking, mainly because there were still not many cars passing by and it was quite cold to stand in one place. 

We walked for about 5 kilometers and by then I also realized that my Norwegian flag was still in my backpack. I took it out and started waving it at the approaching cars. Straight away, we noticed that drivers felt compelled to slow down when they saw the flag, and that made it easier for them to stop also. And sure enough, within a short time, we had our next ride: a very nice man with a woman and baby in the back of the car. We hopped in and he took us to a couple of kilometers further. We got dropped off at a bus stop, which was a perfect place for people to stop. Again, we just waved our Norwegian flag at car drivers until someone stopped. This did not take long at all. Only a few cars came by and we already had our next ride.

We got a ride from a refugee from Syria, who came to Norway 1.5 years ago and had started to rebuild his life here. He asked us whether we had seen the recent reports about Syria’s refugees and we nodded. He told us he had come to Norway under similar circumstances: on a small boat with 200 people, without food, water or toilet for two days. It was a dangerous journey, but he made it. He found a job in Norway and started rebuilding his life. He had lost everything on his way here. In Syria, he was a lawyer. But he could not use his degree in Norway as it is based on French law. He could also no longer leave Norway for the next seven years, until his citizenship is final. So for now, he is doing other jobs. It was evident that this man had been through a lot. His emotions showed in his eyes as he was telling us his story.

We got to the ferry and enjoyed some of the views from the deck. After that he drove us to the next bus stop and pointed us in the right direction, so that we could try and find our next ride.

Again, it did not take long before the next car stopped. It was a guy who was just driving around killing time. He told us he was helping his wife’s father move but he got bored and decided to go for a drive. And then he saw us and decided to help us on our way. Just before a long tunnel (5.1km) he dropped us off and went back. We installed ourselves at another bus stop and waited a little while. Not long after we got there we met Alex, a cheerful guy who was happy to take us along to his destination, very close to Molde. He was Norwegian but his dad was from Chile. He told us he was doing Qi Gong and many other things related to spiritual development. He was told by his spiritual teacher that the revolution of consciousness would start in the middle of Norway, which is where we are. That was very interesting to hear. We realized we shared many of the same views and values and exchanged contact details. I hope we will meet again someday! I was actually inspired to start up my regular Qi Gong routine again.

At the next bus stop it also did not take long before we had our next ride (bus stops seem to be a good place from which to catch a ride) and this next one (a Norwegian elderly couple) took us straight to the city center of Molde; our final destination of the day. There we met up with our second host from Couchsurfing, Maziar from Iran. He was cooking lentil soup for us when we arrived. We got a warm welcome and we decided to go to Atlantic Road straight away because it would be dark soon. Maziar drove us there and back. It was a wonderful addition to our trip, the icing on the cake, because it was the reason for our journey to begin with. We made it! But because our journey had already been such an adventure (with the hitchhiking and meeting so many interesting people), I did not feel as attached to the destination as I may have done otherwise. However, it was great that we could complete our plan in the exact way we had envisioned it.

 

When we got back to the house, we talked about many interesting things. We talked about dating, politics, religion and cultural differences between countries and people. We also listened to good music while enjoying the flavorful meal.

In the morning we got up early, so that we could enjoy the view from the nearby mountain Varden before we went on our way, and after a nourishing breakfast that Maziar made for us. When we got to the top of Varden mountain, at first we mainly saw a lot of clouds but by the time we left it had cleared up and we had a great view of the surrounding mountaintops (apparently there are 220 of them!). 

Then Maziar dropped us off at a bus stop on the road towards Trondheim and we went on the hunt for our next ride. We would aim to go back via Aure or directly, because Kaija (married to Kjetil, who had driven us to Aure from Orkanger) was driving to Trondheim today and had kindly offered to drive us back. So it seemed like we had a good plan for the day. We just had to get back to Aure somehow (or get lucky with a direct ride to Trondheim).

There weren’t many cars yet as it was early in the morning, so we felt that it might take a while before we would get our next ride. We started a game; guessing which cars would stop for us and which would not before they got to us. We guessed a few times and then saw a taxi approaching. 

I did not even wave my flag because both of us were not expecting him to stop. But lo and behold – he did! I asked him if he would take hitchhikers. We made clear we wouldn’t pay, but the driver was super friendly. He said he wanted some company on his way back to Kristiansund (about 70 kilometers and in the right direction) and we could ride with him. We were super excited! This guy was hilarious. He told us all about his life philosophies, and he had many. For example, he said that marriage is like a castle. And most people want to be in when they are out, and out when they are in. This is not good. People should enjoy where they are. If not, then they ruin their lives. Another great example of the importance of living in the present moment and accepting / appreciating where you are right now.

And on the topic of wanting things to be different than they are: he also did not understand why people wanted to mess with nature so much. He had observed that women in Norway are trying too hard to be like men (in the name of 'equality') and thereby creating their own disadvantages and inequality, because they are not fully utilizing their natural strengths and talents. Men and women (and people in general) have different strengths and if we accept that and make use of those strengths, then everyone is as valuable as everyone else, albeit in different ways. There is no need (and even no point) to fight for equality. It is a meaningless battle. Of course there will always be people who disrespect others for whatever reason. But if you don't believe it and if you know your worth, then there is no need to go into battle. Believing in yourself and utilizing your strengths is how you demonstrate equality. Not by fighting, being forceful or trying to become what you are not. If you believe in yourself, you naturally command respect. You will not accept others' beliefs that you may be less, but you don't feel the need to prove yourself or make others wrong either. You know your worth, as well as others'. So if you want to be equal, act like it!

He also wondered why people wanted to go to heaven so badly. What is all the fuss about? Yes, hell would probably be a bit hot but it will probably also be a much livelier place, with many of your friends there (as none of them are perfect). Heaven may just be a lonely place. First you have to strive to be perfect all your life (a very hard and boring task) and then you get to enjoy the rewards all by yourself. It is much easier to get into hell. And how does one enjoy heaven without friends? So have fun, enjoy your life, follow your own moral compass (instead of others' rules) and don’t aim too high. One mistake and you may end up in hell. But if you are okay with hell to begin with, you can’t fail. For me, this translates directly to life on earth and it represents the most balanced stance on happiness and suffering. Be okay with whatever comes your way and you will be able to maintain equanimity at all times. When times are rough, remember that most of your friends are right there with you. Don't worry about it. Enjoy the company. Life is too short to worry about trivial stuff.

We also learned about life as a taxi driver. Obviously this guy meets all kinds of people all the time and so he had learned to gauge people very quickly. Sometimes people were nice and social and sometimes not. He had learned when to talk with people and when to stay silent. He also knew how to handle rude people. If people want to argue or act in a macho way, he just lets them have their fun. To him it is a waste of energy to worry about things like this when those people are only in the car with him for 5 minutes after which they get on with their lives elsewhere. He just lets them be. It all comes back to accepting things as they are and respecting other people, giving them space to be (especially if you don't agree with them) without losing your own integrity.

Of course we also talked about bigger (global) issues, like religion and politics. He was so grateful that he didn’t have great power or a lot of money, because it tends to corrupt people. Most people who have a lot of power and money, only want more. There is no stopping them. It is an endless game and it usually ends badly. It can drive people to kill too. Power and money are the things that drive people to kill; not religions. There is no religion in the world that promotes killing. And this is why he was happy with his life as a taxi driver; it keeps life simple. No need for fights and power struggles. He would not want to be rich or have lots of power; just his taxi to drive people to their next destination. He could not imagine his life without it.

He was from Iraq but had lived in Norway for 19 years. His wish for the world was that people of all religions would live in peace and get along with each other, respecting each other and stop forcing changes on each other. Forcing others to believe what you believe is a demonstration of arrogance and ignorance. If people can respect each other and leave each other be, let others choose how they want to live their lives and stop judging them or imposing changes on them, then this world would be a better place for everyone. If you want to make changes in the world because you believe things are unjust or need to be improved, then the only way is to educate the people; not just coming in with force to tell them how they should live their lives. People have certain traditions for a reason. It is rude and arrogant to want to enforce overnight changes when you don’t even know the history. It creates friction and conflict. And I couldn’t agree more with this man. 

And if this 'imposing change' makes you think about terrorists or 'people from other countries', think again. Haven't Western societies been doing the same thing? And they have done so for aeons. It is time we stop thinking that one way of living is superior to another. Who are you to decide what is best for others? All we can do is engage in exchange of experiences. Exchange personal stories, such as what we did on our trip. We can talk to each other about the hows and whys and learn from each other gradually, instead of telling others how they should live without any reference or knowledge of where people are coming from. Cultural exchange happens naturally if we are open to each other and just focus on sharing and exchanging ideas.

The taxi man dropped us off at the ferry and wished us good luck on the rest of our journey. As we got out of the car he said: “Don’t forget about heaven and hell!” And then he went on his way. What a wise man. Enjoy life and be present. Yes, that is what life is all about.

On the ferry we met a Norwegian couple who could drive us halfway to Aure. We got dropped off at a quiet road with not that much traffic, so we started walking for a bit. We walked for a while and tried to hitch some rides along the way whenever a car approached us.

Eventually someone stopped again. It was a funny and animated German guy. He did not speak English so we conversed in German. He was on his way to buy cigarettes in the nearest town, which happened to be Aure, and our destination. He told us how he had come to Norway in 2007, but had experienced a lot of discrimination from others in the small community where he was living. It had been a tough few years in the beginning and he really had to fight to be accepted as a person. There was also a lot of resistance towards his ideas to improve the community in the beginning, even though he had many good ideas. (Perhaps he had tried to be too forceful - we know now that that doesn't work.)

But now he was finally at a stage where he was collaborating with other people in the village and they were almost ready to open their first community workplace. It was frustrating in the beginning because people were resisting his ideas without good reasons (according to him). He had read many philosophical books in his time but the people there had not and they never even considered doing things differently before. So it was quite a battle in the beginning. As he talked and explained his views on life he made large gestures and sometimes the car strayed across the road accordingly. Luckily we made it without swerving off the road. He brought us back to the city centre in Aure, where we had first met Adrian on Friday night.

This time we met with Kjetil’s wife, Kaija, and her son for our journey back. We even got dropped off at our homes! Our trip had come full circle. What a journey it had been. Filled with such wonderful people, all different and all fascinating in their own way. I felt very blessed to have met them. All the highlights of this trip had to do with the people we met, even though we saw some amazing and wonderful things on the way too, such as the gorgeous views all around us, the Atlantic Road and the panoramic view of the ocean as well as all the mountain tops visible from atop Varden mountain.

An open mind generates an open heart

Every person has a story to tell, no matter who they are or where they are from. If you are willing to listen, you will find it interesting and you will learn something. Next time you meet someone, find out what their story is if they are willing to share it with you. And share yours if they are open to it. You may be surprised, or you may be amazed. If you are not surprised, inspired, awed or moved in any way, then chances are you haven’t heard the full story.

Self-sufficiency is not all about learning to do everything for yourself. It is also about learning to work together. Having grown up in a very individualistic society, this is something I had to learn through experience. Life is so much easier and more fun when we work together and help each other. Although it is good to have skills so that you don't have to depend on others in tough times, why not choose to work together at other times? Share the skills you have learned so far with others, and be open to learning from others. We all have unique skills and talents. This is how we evolve and grow.

Also, it is good to remember that you just never know what to expect in life. Even a taxi driver could drive you to your next destination for free. You can never be sure about anything until it happens or doesn’t happen. There are no guarantees. And that is a good thing. Another miracle can always be just around the corner.